This evening "D" called me to the kitchen to look out the windows at the moon. She was a beautiful and bright crescent. We both went out onto the deck to take photos, but nothing I took came out well. Since it was so clear and lovely I sat out for a while watching the sky.
There were so many stars winking at me it made me smile the entire time I was out there. I know there were planets in and among the stars, also a plane or two went by very high up, possibly a satellite as well. And, always UFOs! But the nice aliens, not the ones to want take over our planet.
As I watched the night sky I thought about how alone we are. We sit on this little blue rock in the vastness of our galaxy, not to mention the universe, and all we do is fight. And hate. And become so incredibly ugly. Why?
I get caught up in all this nonsense at times, writing in anger or disgust over things others post online. When I surface from these ugly conversations, not wanting to ingest any more of the bile that is spewed, I wonder why I let myself get drawn into these things. Human nature? I do believe I am better than this. I know I was raised better than this.
This rock,the third rock from the sun, is all we have. And we are all we have. The worse enemy of any one of us, when cut, will bleed the same colour blood that I do. This enemy has the same organs that I do. But, this enemy has decided to hate me because of my __________(fill in the blank). And when my enemy or I die that's it for us. We're done. Finished. Through. All the time we wasted in hating has done nothing. We hate out of fear, or anger, or ignorance. Why? I don't want to hate anyone, not even my worst enemy. Hate, for me, is a dead-end street. I'm not excusing all the vile things that are done by vile people. I'm not some sort Pollyanna or trying for sainthood. I'm saying that in my own very small way I am choosing, for whatever time I have left on this blue rock hurtling through space, that I am going to try my level best to be a nice person. That's it - just be nice.
Some days will be harder than others. I will, at times, probably show my middle finger to drivers who do insanely stupid things that nearly cause an accident. I will probably still yell at politicians in their 30second sound bites when they say something I find egregiously stupid. I will still get irritated over things too numerous to discuss. But, in all of this, I am still going to try to be nice. I'm not going to allow myself to get caught up in conversations online or in person that, in the end, can only cause harm to my well-being. I am not going to get caught up in all the drama that most people call "real life".
And when I falter, I am going to go back out on my deck and allow the moon and the night sky restore me to my better self.
